Hmmmm..... what to blog about? (And how Helen Met Victor)

I was instructed, by my who-the-heck-are-you friend on Facebook (we all have one) to start blogging. I picked him up on a feminist page, after he posted a comment of the ‘what you getting your collective knickers in a twist about, biatches?’ ilk, and was branded a troll by the radicals on there, and shunned forevermore into the netherworld of chauvinism. Feeling for the poor fellow, who did, in actual fact, ask a fairly straightforward question, I took him under my wing and attempted to untangle his misconceptions – (equality does not necessarily mean being treated the same, we aren't anti-men just pro-women etc etc) and since then we have developed a mutually curious Facebook friendship. enjoying my status updates, he suggested I started blogging, and gave me the following 4 topics to choose from:

Depression, a leprechaun’s guide,

Women and Shoes, wtf

Librarianship.

Coffee shops – what went wrong?



The first, straight off, is a no-no. As I understand the little fellows, Leprachauns are, perhaps, God’s happiest creatures, all rainbows and pots of gold and leaping over patches of mud with joyful abandon. Why bring them down with talk of disturbed sleeping patterns, loss of interest in hobbies and declining personal care standards? One can almost hear their little sorrowful cries: ‘To be sure, things aren’t that bad, surely no?’


A leprechaun's guide to depression: what good could come of it?


Women and shoes.
 He suggested this, perhaps expecting a rant of the ‘Why do women love shoes so much, they’re mental’ variety, but, to a small extent, I am one of those women. Perhaps not to the extent of my good friend Eleanor, but I can get excited by a pair of green, faux suede hush-puppy pumps. I once loved a pair of shoes so much I nonchalantly re-priced them to my own liking in TK Maxx, paid, and suffered a month of sleepless nights and loss of appetite as a result (sorry to any Leprachauns reading this).

Librarianship
I work in a library. I am writing this in my office in the library, having run out of things to do, and being somewhat afraid of the existentialist angst an hour of shelving books can lead me into. I have never been tempted to take the long and arduous road into professionalism, but I have plenty to say on binding, spining, book repairs, looking for lost journals and the technologisation of the modern library, if any of you are interested – what’s that? No? you’d rather listen to a fishing match on the radio? Very Well.

Coffee shops – what went wrong?
Lack of fair trade coffee. Too much froth in cappuccinos. Apathetic Barristas. Prices. The fact that chocolate sprinkle stencils are not in use across the board. The pictures on every wall of Italians laughing their heads off while drinking their espressos, making me feel as if I am underperforming by drinking mine like a background figure in a Hopper painting. There, no further comment necessary.